The Top 5 Ways to Overcome Hopelessness

Before you read how to combat hopelessness, I want to remind you that I am giving away 10 copies of the book called, The Shack It is written by William Paul Young. It has been the # 1 best selling list for the last 45 weeks ont the New York best selling list. It has sold 6.2 million books in just two years. Not only am I giving them away, but they each will have a personal note, and the author’s autograph.

This is a real collectors item.

To have a chance to win one, all you have to do is go to the right side bar of this site and click on “sign up for my free newsletter,” put in your email address, and you are eligible to win one of the books.

Hurry the drawing for the books will be on April 15th! (Great day to win something don’t you think?)

Want more chances to win? Just tell your friends to sign up also. For each one you sign up, your email address will be put in the hat again. If you get 15 people to sign up you will have 16 chances to win. To get credit for their emails address,  just send me all of the email addresses of people you got to sign up. I will then check my list and if they are there you get credit.

Go out there and dig up some more subscribers, and win one of these very special collecters books.

Ok… Now you will learn everything you wanted to know about how to get rid of hopelessness, but was afraid to ask:

 

The Top 5 Ways to Overcome Hopelessness

 

 

We have all faced in some point in our lives where we felt that there was no way out of a situation, or we had a feeling of wanting to give up. This is what hopelessness is all about. It pulls us down like magnets into the pit of despair.

 

What makes a person resilient? In studies of children who have come from abusive home situations and then have gone on to lead successful and happy lives, almost all found an adult or mentor outside the immediate family. They also found a grandmother, a minister or some loving person to help them. They knew someone who gave them a sense of being loved and important.

 

During World War II, Dr. Victor Fankel was imprisoned by the Nazis because he was a Jew. His wife, children, and parents were all killed in the Holocaust. At one point, the prison guards cut his wedding band off his finger. Frankel said to himself, “You can take away my wife and children, you can strip me of my clothes and my freedom, but there is one thing no person can ever take away from me- and that is my freedom to choose how I will react to what happens to me.”

 

Before the Civil War, Edmund McIlenny operated a Sugar plantation and a saltworks on Avery Island, Louisiana. Yankee troops invaded the area in 1863 and McIlenny had to flee. When he returned in 1865, his sugar fields and saltworks were ruined. One of the few things left were some hot Mexican peppers that had reseeded themselves in the kitchen garden. McIlenny, who was living hand to mouth, started experimenting with the ground peppers to make a sauce that would liven up his dull diet. His newfound sauce is known today as Tabasco sauce. To this day, over a hundred years later, the McIlenny Company and its Tabasco business is still run by the McIlenny family.

 

What common thread runs through these three articles? They all faced hopelessness, but each situation they found a way to win over it, and survive.

 

That is what you need to do, and here are 5 ways to do just that:

 

  1. Turn to someone who can help you with your hopelessness. Like the children did in the first example, look for a friend; an uncle or aunt. Maybe it could be an old high school buddy. Seek-out the ones who made you laugh. Find the ones who liked to listen to you and not talk. Someone you can trust. Look for the ones who can advise you, and not judge you.
  2. Decide that no matter what happens you will not let the situation overcome you. Never give up!! Never ever give up!!
  3. If something bad happens use it to create something good. Open new doors. Check out new paths. Think of another way to get to your goal.
  4. Write your hurts in the sand and your happiness in cement. Never let past negative events control your future. They are gone, and the future is still there.
  5. Do something outlandish! Go on a trip you never thought you could go on. Take on a new project that you always wanted to try. Be adventurous! This will let your mind go in another direction. It will push your negative thinking away and fill your mind with something more pleasant.           

Try what I did and turn all your hopelessness over to God. He has the biggest shoulders in the universe. I have faced hopelessness many times in my past. When I left the trials on God’s doorstep, the feeling I had after I released my physical and mental pain is something that everyone should experience. God knows your hurts and pain. He just wants you to seek Him for help and He will be there with open arms.

 

Doug

 

 

 

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The Top 10 Ways to Chase the Blues Away.

Win a National best Selling Book with Autograph!

 

Before I share the next “the top ways,” article, I want to remind you that I have 10 copies of The Shack, written by William Paul Young, which he personally autographed. He put a personal note, and wrote his autograph for each one. The book has been # 1 on the New York Times top ten books list for over 40 weeks.

 

You can have a chance to win one!! It is very simple: Just got to my author site at: www.dougbolton.com, click on the, “Sign up for my free newsletter,” icon and put in your email address. Everyone who subscribes will have a chance to win an autographed bookss by one the hottest authors on the planet!

 

That is not all!! For every person your get to subscribe, you will get another chance to win a book. So if you get 20 people to subscribe, you’ll have 21 chances to win the book.

The way I will know that you had them subscribe is to have you send me all the email addresses that you had sign up. Then I will check my list. If they are there you get credit. So get out there and find as many people as you can. This book with the author’s autograph will be a real collector’s item.

 

Now for the top ways article…..

 

________________________________________________________________________

 

The Top 10 Ways to Chase the Blues Away

 

Doug Bolton

 

 

From 1986 to 1990 Frank Reed was held hostage in a Lebanon cell. For months at a time Reed was blindfolded, living in complete darkness, or chained to a wall and kept in absolute silence. On one occasion, he was moved to another room, and, although blindfolded, he could sense others in the room. Yet it was three weeks before he dared peek out to discover he was chained next to Terry Anderson and Tom Sutherland.

 

Although he was beaten, made ill, and tormented, Reed felt most the lack of anyone caring. He said in an interview with Time, “Nothing I did mattered to anyone. I began to realize how withering it is to exist with not a single expression of caring around me. I learned one overriding fact: caring is a powerful force. If no one cares you are truly alone.”

 

Have you felt this way? Do you wonder if anyone cares? What follows are a few suggestions to let you know that doing things positive will help you see that others care and most importantly that you care for yourself.

 

Top 10 Ways to chase the blues away:

 

 

1.     Get out and visit more of your friends and social contacts. Just being with someone, even if it is a stranger you just met, helps you to feel better. They may sense that you are feeling down, and will find ways to cheer you up. Friends never let friends stay sad.

 

2.     List what you appreciate. Write down all the things you are grateful for. It may seem childish to do this, but this has been proven to be the most productive thing you can do to feel better. I am grateful for spring when the flowers start blooming. I am grateful my grandchildren. I am grateful for having a full tank of gas! I am grateful that you are reading this post!

 

3.     Think of all the good things that happened today. It can be little things like having green lights all the way to work; a special email from a friend; talking to a neighbor at the mail box, or finding a gas station with the lowest gas prices. (If you do find one let me know where it is!!!) Write the good things down, and keep doing this everyday. You will be amazed how many more good things happen than bad things. It seems that we always dwell on the bad things because they hurt us and stand out more. Time to turn that around!

 

4.     Decide what is more important in your life, material things or things that give you lasting memories. A special trip is in your memories forever. A car or boat runs down after a while, but memories last forever. Go somewhere that you have never been before. Be adventurous. Aloha!!

 

5.     Do you own a favorite DVD, or TV show that is funny? Watch it as many times as you are able to over the weekend. Have a marathon! You can’t help but laugh and cheer up when you see funny scenes on the screen. Animal House is always a good stand-by. How about the Police Academy series?

 

6.     Think of a place where you always feel calm. I feel calm and relaxed when I am at the beach. Oregon has some beautiful coast lines, and the sound of the waves, plus the scenery along the beach is hard to pass up. Just sit on a big rock and listen. Be careful for those seagulls though. They can put a frown back on your face!

 

7.     Do you always see the glass half empty? Do a flip-flop and think of it as half full. Don’t be pessimistic all the time. Always think good things will happen. Instead of thinking you will lose the race, think that you will finish the race. Instead of worrying about what you boss thinks about you, realize that it’s Friday! Instead of worrying about making friends be a friend.

 

8.     Do you have a knack for writing poems or short stories? Have at it!! Writing is great therapy especially in a journal. I leave all my hurts and negative thoughts in my journal. Later I can see how I may have felt that way. You can see your growth as you write too. Writing down thoughts can be a big factor in dumping sad feelings.

 

9.     Go help someone else that is unhappy. This works every time! You can’t feel sad after you have helped someone else to feel good. It is very contagious. Go to that neighbor that thinks they don’t have anyone that cares for them. Call that friend that recently lost their spouse. Hug a child that feels sad that day.

 

10.   Do something special. Go out to lunch with a friend. Ride a bike. Play croquet in the back yard with your children. Just sit and listen to the birds on your patio. I did that once, and the feeling was incredible!! Birds have such a soothing sound and a very beautiful sound by the way; except for crows.

 

Use all these ideas to help you get back to the person you know you can be. You are a special person that only you can change. It is time to get rid of those negative thoughts, and replace them with thoughts that will lift you up each day. Start now!!!

 

 



 

 

 

 

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The Top 5 Ways to Overcome Hopelessness

The life we must live in now is hard at best. We are facing a down economy that has had many huge retail chains fail. Many people have been laid off, and their futures looking dim. We need guidence on how to cope in this kind of environment.

Go to www.dougbolton.com and sign up for the newsletter that has excerpts from the book, Close Encounters of the Heavenly Kind: Through Bumper Stickers. It shares ideas on how to survive in the world we live in today.

What follows are some thoughts on how to make it from day to day.

 

The Top five Ways to Overcome Hopelessness

 

What makes a person resilient? In studies of children who have come from abusive home situations and then have gone on to lead successful and happy lives, almost all found an adult or mentor outside the immediate family- a grandmother, a minister or some loving personomeone who gave them a sense of being loved and important.

 

During World War II, Dr. Victor Fankel was imprisoned by the Nazis because he was a Jew. His wife, children, and parents were all killed in the Holocaust. At one point, the prison guards cut his wedding band off his finger. Frankel said to himself, “You can take away my wife and children, you can strip me of my clothes and my freedom, but there is one thing no person can ever take away from me- and that is my freedom to choose how I will react to what happens to me.”

 

Before the Civil War, Edmund McIlenny operated a Sugar plantation and a saltworks on Avery Island, Louisiana. Yankee troops invaded the area in 1863 and McIlenny had to flee. When he returned in 1865, his sugar fields and saltworks were ruined. One of the few things left were some hot Mexican peppers that had reseeded themselves in the kitchen garden. McIlenny, who was living hand to mouth, started experimenting with the ground peppers to make a sauce that would liven up his dull diet. His newfound sauce is known today as Tabasco sauce. To this day, over a hundred years later, the McIlenny Company and its Tabasco business is still run by the McIlenny family.

 

What common thread runs through these three articles? They all faced hopelessness, but each situation they found a way to win over it, and survive.

 

That is what you need to do, and here are 5 ways to do just that:

 

1.     Turn to someone who can help you with your hopelessness. Like the children did in the first example, look for a friend; an uncle or aunt. Maybe it could be an old high school buddy. Find the ones who made you laugh. Find the ones who liked to listen to you and not talk. Find the ones who can advise you, and not judge you.

2.     Decide that no matter what happens you will not let the situation overcome you. Never give up!! Never ever give up!!

3.     If something bad happens use it to create something good. Open new doors. Check out new paths. Think of another way to get to your goal.

4.     Write your hurts in the sand and your happiness in cement. Never let past negative events control your future. They are gone, and the future is still there.

5.     Turn all your hopelessness over to God. He has the biggest shoulders in the universe. I have done that many times, and the feeling I had after I released my pain is something that everyone should experience.

Go to www.dougbolton.com to see excerpts from the book, Close Encounters of the Heavenly Kind: Through Bumper Stickers. This book shares ways to cope in a world of lost jobs, high gas prices, down economy, divorce, failure, and hopelessness.

 

Doug Bolton

 

 

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I Want to Get Rid of my Husband!

                   I want to get rid of my husband!

 

J. Alan Peterson, in The Myth of the Greener Grass, writes:

 

Newspaper columnist and minister George Crane tells of a wife who came into his office full of hatred toward her husband. “I do not only want to get rid of him; I want to get even. Before I divorce him, I want to hurt him as much as he has me.”

 

Dr Crane suggested an ingenious plan. “Go home and act as if you really love your husband. Tell him how much he means to you. Praise him for every decent trait. Go out of your way to be as kind, considerate, and generous as possible. Spare no efforts to please him, to enjoy him. Make him believe you love him. After you’ve convinced him, then drop the bomb. Tell him you are getting a divorce. That will really hurt him.”

 

With revenge in her eyes, she smiled and exclaimed, “Beautiful, beautiful. Will he be surprised!”

 

And she did it with enthusiasm. Acting “as if.” For two months she showed love, kindness, listening, giving, reinforcement, sharing.

 

When she didn’t return, Crane called. “Are you ready now to go through with the divorce?”

 

“Divorce!” she exclaimed. “Never! I discovered I really do love him.” Her actions had changed her feelings. Motion resulted in emotion. The ability to love is established not so much by fervent promise as often repeated deeds.

 

My wife and I were in a similar state early in our marriage. That was twenty years ago. We both stood in a corner feeling trapped, and couldn’t get out. We had our needs, and they weren’t being met.

 

We tried going to one counselor, and he was totally one sided. He felt I was the one that had to “straighten,” up. I guess you can figure out that didn’t go very well.

Then we went to a female counselor, and she was perfect for us. She never took sides. She got each of us to share our differences. We learned one very important thing: YOUR SPOUSE IS NOT THE ENEMY!! She made us realize that our spouse was a person we loved, and even married. Once we believed that, we could see that the problem was not the other person, but something inside each of us.

 

So we were able to concentrate on clearing up our own inadequacies and what came out of it was a better understanding that we are important but so is your spouse. You need to depend on each for support. We should show the other person how much we care for them. By doing this we become closer very quickly, just like the person did in the story.

 

Having a “war,” going on in your household can cause stress, anxiety, and yes even the famous word depression. Calm the storm, work out your differences and you will be much happier; have less stress, anxiety, and depression.

 

Sorry, I do not have the top five ways to get rid of your husband.

 

Check out my author site where you can get actual excerpts from the book, Close Encounters of the Heavenly Kind: Life Beyond Bumper Stickers. It deals with ways to handle the afflictions of life we face that weigh us down like a magnate was pulling on us. It could be self doubt, anxiety, fear, depression, or low self esteem.

 

Doug Bolton

Blog: www.depressionsuppressed.com

Website: www.dougbolton.com

 

 

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